"First date?"

So my crush on Terryl is well documented. Well it came to a head in the early summer of 2000...

Chalmers and I were driving around, and we decided to see what Sean was up to. We drove to his house and Terryl answered the door. She said Sean was out. Instead of departing, she made us feel welcome to stay and chat. So we talked for a bit and the subject of dating came up. Now I won't lie, I suffer from lack of confidence so the words that came out of my mouth were: "No girl's going to date me."
Terryl replied "I'm sure some girl will go out with you."
"Would you," I asked point blank.
I don't remember what exactly she said but it was something to the effect of she'd go on a friendly date but I wasn't to get the idea that we were boyfriend/girlfriend.
Hot diggedy-damn that was good enough for me!!

So it was arranged that we were going on a friendly date, and we'd make it a double date. Terryl with me, Jen with Chalmers. My elation soon turned to doubt. She's only doing this out of pity, I thought. I was hanging out with Sean and almost as if she read my mind , Terryl came down and said to me "I hope you don't think this is a pity date, because it's not"

I was feeling high as a kite but just like a rollercoaster you have to go up before the big come down.

Somewhere between our initial talk and the actual date, the plans evolved. Now it was a triple date. Sean and Georgette decided to join us. And they sort of took over and changed the time and place of the date. We went to the drive -in theatre instead. This meant that Chalmers, who had to work that day, couldn't make it untill the end of the first movie.

Anyway the evening came. I had gone to the Mystic Bookstore and bought Terryl a birthstone and case for it. It was my way of showing I wasn't a cheap date. I put on my"least smeggy clothes" and my cologne. I got in the van and it smelled the smell of car-freshener. The smell to this day haunts me, but at the time it smelled like victory.

We got to the theatre and that's when things went off. Jen and Terryl ran off int the woods to be all girly, leaving me to talk to Sean and Georgette. I was stil pleased as punch but I was beginning to feel the distance being placed between us, reminding me that this was a mock-date. We watched the movie Gone in 60 seconds. By the time Chalmers arrived, Jen and Terryl were sitting in the front, Sean and Georgette were in the back, and I was alone in the middle. The first movie ended and now Chamers who had just arrrived was informed that he now had to drive the girls home. He was livid, and I don't blame him.

By the this time the sadnesss began that took quite some time to heal. I should have known not to get my hopes up but when you want something so bad and something closely resembling it comes along, it is hard to resist.

I've gotten over this now. I still haven't been on a real first date but I've had things like it. Coffee with young ladies mostly. But I believe Terryl's words that I will find a girl to date. This belief has taken years to form and it is a good beginning in my war against poor self-esteem.